Page 4 from my life....

Doston, aur parhne walon, ho sakta hai ke meri iss tarhanki share ki howi batain aap ko achi na lagain ke main apna badla lene k liye ya phir intiqami jazbe ke tehet dosre logon k nam likh raha hon aur un k kahani bhi likh raha hon, mgr main aap sab ko yeah yaqin dilate honk e jin jin k naam likhta hon aur ziker karta hon who sab hi aaj mere contact main hain aur hum aik dost nahi bus tym pass ki hesiyat say aik dosre say net par chit chat kar lete hain kuch logon say rabita nahi ho saka isi liye un ka zikr tu ho sakta hai mgr naam aur shanaqt k bagher. Rahi meri shanaqt aur naam tu jese hi yeah kahan I khatm hogi akhri safhe par mera naam aur meri shanaqt zaroor hogi yeah mera khud say wada hai aur aap sab hi say mera ehd….

Main kisi na kisi tarhan Asif k khayalat say khud ko door rarkhne ko koshish kar raha tha jis k liye main nai anjae main apne cosin ka sahara lia, meri pori koshish yehi thi k mera cosin mere ehsasat ko kahi samjh n alai gr who umr main mujh say bara tha aur mujh say kahin ziada social meri feelings ko bhaanp hi gaya. Main nai apni pori tawajah apne U.K jane par rakhi hoi thi sath hi sath main koshish kar raha tha keh mere jane say mere gher par kisi qisam ki koi pareshani na ho. Kiun k mere jane k liye peson kizaroorat thi kuch pese tu jama thy mgr gher k akhrajat k liye kia karon yehi soch raha tha. Main nai apne daftr say resign kar dia, mere boss nai mujh say pocha k beta kisi bhi qisam ki koi zaroorat ho tu mujh ko batana, sath hi mujh ko kaha k last working day tum zaroor ana tumhari salary main dilwa don gaa. Main nai wada kia k main zaroor aon ga. Esi doran mere British counsil ke chakar lagte rahe, kabhivisa procces kabhi kuch kabhi kuch, phir embassy main interview k liye Islamabad jane ka howa tu main ane cosin Bilal k sath hi jane ka fesla kia, hum log ne esa plan kia tha k yahan say jis din nikle next day interview dain aur usi shaam wapis Karachi ajain. Office main bhi sab ne mujh ko bht duain di. Mgr Asif kahi nahi dikha us ko wese bhi nokri ya parhai say koi khaas dilchasppi nahi thi, bare gher ka beta tha sab kuch tu tha hi us k pass us ko bhala kisi bhibaat ki kia fiker ho sakti thi?

Esi tarhan main aur Bilal Islamabad k liye rawwana ho gai, mere pas tu bus apnne hisab say pese thy mgr Bilal nai achi khasi raqm sath rakhi hoi thi. Us ne mujh ko nahi bataya k who Islamabad k sath sath murree waghera bhi jane ka erada rakhta hai. Hum log by bus Islamabad gaye thy aur bus nai hum ko bilkul waqt par hi hum ko Faizabad k stop par utar diya tha kiun k safr ki thakan thi is liye kisi hotel jana bht zaroori tha, hum log pindi k aik hotel “Gandhara Hotel – liaqat bagh” main gai aur aik room rent par lia. Thakan tu thi mgr embassy main jane main kuch waqt tha esi liye hum log foran fresh howe aur texi kar k embassy ki taraf rawana howe, ebassy k area main texi ko jane ki ijazat nahi hai bari mushkil say passport dikha kar hum ko andar jane ki ijazat mili. Mgr Bilal ko nahi kiun k us k pas na hi call letter than a hi passport. Who kehne laga k main Abpara pe wait karta hon. Andar gaya interview howa aur 5 hours k baad wapis bahar nikla tu aik sakoon sath ha. K sab say bara marhala mukamil howa.

Hum log wapis hotel aye main nai kaa k main bht thak gaya hon aram karon ga, us neb hi yehi kaha hum khana kha kar su gaye raat ko ankh khuli aur main nai kaha k abh wapsi ka safr karte hain. Us ne kaha k 2 din aur rukte hain aur murree waghera ghom k chalet hain mgr main nai mana kar dia. Meri zid k agai who har maan gaya aur hum nay usi rat Karachi wapis ane ka faisla kia bus stand par aye tu Karachi k liye koi bus nahi thi han Lahore k liye bus ja rahi thi, hum log Lahore k liye nikal pare aur waha say Karachi jane ka faisla kia. Safr bht khamoshi say guzra bus ne hum ko 5 hours main lhr utar dia wahan say hum seedha station aye aur Karachi jane wali Shalimar express ka tickt lia aur station par hi baith gaye, us waqt Bilal nai mera interview lena shuru kia, us ka lehja aik dam badla howa tha aur batain ilkul alag thi. Us nai mujh say bht sawal kie, mere bachpan, mere doston, meri family aur mere bare main main bhi koshish kar raha tha k har sawal ka jawab tasali say don aur koshish karon k job hi ho woh mutmain ho jae. Mgr us k har sawal k peche koi na koi dusra sawal hota tha, thora dair main train platform par lag ai aur hum us main sawar ho gai, humare pass aik birth thi aur aik seat. Main aur bilal birth par baith gai aur main ne kaha k thora dair main let jata hon thora dair tum let jao. Main jese hi leta meri ankh lag gai mujh ko Bilal nai us waqt uthaaya jabh Khanewal ka station agaya tha. Aur bhook bhi lag rahi thi. Hum ne pai bhar k wahan khana khaya aur train main sawar ho gai. Abh uss k sone ki bari thi mgr who leta nahi bus betha hi raha aur hum edhr udhr ki batain karte rahe. Mgr mujh ko esa laga k jese us nai mujh main chupa howa insan pakar lia hai aur us ki nigahian mujh ko abh chubhti hoi mehsoos ho rahi thi. Main pata nahi kiun us kinighaon ka samna nahi kar paa raha tha. Bus yehi dua kar raha tha k jaldi say Karachi ajae, ese hi bethe bethe main aik risala parta raha aur who taik laga kar su gaya, ahista ahista station ate jaa rahe thy ar main apne mustaqbil ki tayari main sooch raha tha. Rohri aya tu socha k us ko utha don k kuch kha lai pata nahi gari abh kaha ruke gi us ko uthaya tu who nahi utha. Main nai ehtiyatan station say kuch stuff le lia k ar raat ko bhook lagi tu kaam aye gi. Train ka tym raat 12 pe Karachi puhanchne ka tha aur train qismat say raat 12 baje landhi station par thi k bilal utha. Us ne pocha k konsa station hai tu main nai us ko jawab dia k landhi tu who jhatke say utha ark aha yar hum log Drigroad utar jate hain, Cent say fasla bht ho jae ga. Main nai station par utarne k liye apna jo saman phela howa tha sameta aur aik dam ready ho gaya. Main nai us say poca k etni rat ko tum apne gher jaon gay ya mere sath chalo gay tu us ne kaha k who mujh ko mere gher chore gaa aur phir apne gher jae gaa. Hum Drigroad station par utre aur wahan say aik texi kar k us ne mujh ko mere gher chora aur apne gher chala gaya, ami ny us ko bht roka k etni raat ko na jao mgr us ne kaha k kal ajaon ga. Main bht thaka howa tha mustaqil safr phir aik ajib sa khoof k abh kia hoga. Fresh ho kar ami k sath beth gaya nend nahi arahi thi ami ne pocha k kia howa wahan tu ami ko bataya ami neb hi dua di. Abhu ka bhi phone agaya aur dua di.

Agli subh ankh nahi khuli, sham 4 baje jab Bilal aya tu ami ny utaa k abh sham ho chuki hai uth jao. Main utha aur uth kar fresh ho kar bilal k sath beth gaya ami e kane ka poca tu main nai jst tea ka kaha. Phir mere bos ka phone aya k kal zaroor ana hai. Main nai kaha thik hai. Phir bilal ne kaha k wahan tu paint shirt hi pehna hogi mgr mere pas ziada kapre nahi thy jo sath le jata Bilal ne kaha k mere pas kuch kapre extra hain who sath le jana mgr etni dair main ami ishara kar chuki thi k nahi kisi say aur khas kar kisi bhi rishte dar say kuch bhi nahi lena hai.

Bilal kuch rasmi batain kar k chala gaya aur main ese hi hawa khae gher say bahar nikal aya aur gher k qarib hi aik park main baith gaya. Rastem main pata nahi kiun aik cigerate le lit hi mgr jalai nahi thi. Dil aur dimagh aik ajib mushkil main tha, meri life ka yea saal bht afra tafrih le kar aya tha sabh kuch jaldi jaldi ho raha tha. Meri job, exam, sis ki shadi, Asif, Atif, abh yea Bilal. Phir mera jana, aur tayari, gher ki fiker, main nai dil hi dil main dua kari, “ALLAH mujh ko himat day, agr main ghalt hon tu mujh ko sedha rasta dikha aur sahi hon tu mujh ko kamyab kar.”

Aur edhr udhr dekh kar cigert jalae laga. Pehil dafa aik hotel par beth kar pi thi aur aaj park main beth kar pee raha tha….

Cigerte pe kar aik hotel gaya wahan achi tarhan moun saaf kia supari khai. Aik buble moun main dal aur khud ko pursakon zahir karta howa gher ki taraf ane laga. Gher main dakhil howa tu ami ka mod bht bht kharab tha. Main samjha k shayad abu say koi bat hoi ho ya kisi ne kuch kaa ho main andr gaya tu meri chooti sis nai bataya k bhai aaj aap ki kher nahi. Main nai kaha kiun kia howa? Tu us ne kuch nahi kaha kiun k ami adar agai thi. Main khud ko pursakon zahir karte howe Tv ki taraf dekhne laga. Ussi waqt ami mere samne aye aur mere moun par aik zoor ka tamacha mara… main aik dam haka baka k ami ne mere job karne k baad say mujh par hath nahi uthaya tha k main bara ho gaya hon haan batain bht sunati thi. Tu yeah tamasha kiun?

Phir khud hi boli k tere dost Asif nai aur kia kia sikhaya hai tujh ko? Mere peron k niche say zamin nikal gai, ajib ajib khayalat dimagh main nae lage, Asif aya tha kia kahin us nai ammi ko sabh kuch tu nahi bata dia waghera waghera, aur main khud hi paseene main nahane laga. Ami nai aik aur tamasha mara aur pocha k yeah cigerate kab say pee raha hai tu? Main aik dafa phir heran tha k main tu park main baith kar pee raha tha ye bat yahan tak kese agai mgr main ami k samne jhot nahi bol sakta tha main nai ami ko saaf saf keh dia k, “aj dosri dafa pii hai iss say pehle bus aik dafa jo chahe qasm le lo.” Ami ne mujh ko jo marna shuru kia tu usi waqt ruki jab who thak gai, sis aur muhale ki ain aunty bhi agai aura mi ko samjhane lagi k bacha jawan hai ese nahi marte mgr ami nahi ruki, main aik taraf khara hi tha aur ankhon main bus ansoo thy. Hazar khayal mere dil main arahe thy mgr yeah samjh nahi araha tha k yea bat batai kis nai hogi?

Jabh ami thak gait u dosre kamre main chali gai main esi room main baith gaya phir thora dair baad muhale wali aunty aye aur kaha k jao ami say maffi mango aur kaho k abh nahi peo gay. Main uta aura mi k pas gaya, main nai ami say kaha k main koi esakaam nahi karon gaa jis say aap ko taklif ho. Aur na hi kara hai. Aap ko kis nai bataya k main yea kar raha tha. Unhon nai muhale k usi larke ka nam lia jo aaj kal mera behnoi hai. Mujh ko bht ghusa aya, aur dukh bhihowa k etni giri hoi harkat? Kher dafa karo us ko, ami nai kaha k abh peye ga, main nai dil mazboot kar k kaa k ami main pori koshish karon ga k jitna bach sakta hon bachon mgr wada es liye nahi kar sakta k anai wali life main kab kia hoga mujh ko khud nahi pata. Ami nai mujh ko gale lagaya aur kaha k thik hai tum apni pori koshish karna mujh ko tum par bharosa hai.

Main nai esi tarhan rat guzari, mutlab k sochte howe k abh kis pe bharosa kia jae, kon hai esa jo mujh ko meri had tak rakhe har kisi say share na kare. Bht kam umr main gher ki zimedari sambhali, na hi bachpan samjh saka na hi jawani samjh main arahi hai. Meri khud ki bhi koi life hogi k nahi? Enhi sochon main su gaya subh 6 baje ami nai uthaya kiun k aaj mera daftr main last day tha. Main ne wohi kapre pehne jo main nai first tym office jate howe pehne thy aur tayar ho kar daftr k liyenikla. Bilkul esa lag raha tha k jesa aaj mera pehla din hai. Apne daftr main gaya tu jese sabh hi mere muntazir thy. Sabh nai bht garm jooshi say mera istaqbal kia. Mere boss khud attendance room main aye aur mujh ko gale lagaya aur emra hath pakar kar daftr main le gae, pehli dafa apne samne bitha kar mujh ko kaha, “beta aaj tak main nai tum par bht sakhti kari, tum ko bht bura bhala kaha, jis k liye main sharminda hon, mgr yea sabh tumahre liye bht zaroori tha tumhari pehli nokrithi aur tum ko bht kuch sekhna tha aur abhi bhi bht kuch seekhna hai. Meri koi aulad nahi hai main tum say kabhi kuch keh nahi saka magr aaj kehta hon k tum mere bete jese ho aur jitni mehnat say tum kaam karte ho aur apni khuddari k agai har nahi mante mujh ko tum par naaz hai. Aur apni drawz main say aik lifafa nikala aur  mujh ko dete howe kaha beta yeah 50000/= (pacha hazar hain) I know k yeah kam hain abhi etne rakho aur kabhi bhi kahin bhi zaroorat pare mujh ko pehle atana tum yahan gher ki fikr na karna jab tak tumhara waha koi mustaqil intizam nahi hojata tumhari tnakhwah jitni raqm khamoshi k sath tumhare gher puhanch jaya kare ge. Main nai herani say un ki taraf dekha aur inkar kia tu unhon nai kaha k “tum mere bete ho tu yeam mera frz hai k main bhi kuch karon, wese bhi tum nai meribht khidmat kari hai.” Main achanak hi rona shuru howa, pehli dfa mere boss jin ko main dil hi dil main Hitler kaha karta tha etne narm dil aur etne piyar karne wale aur etna khayal rakhne wale honge socha bhi na tha, who bhi pehli dafa rone lage phir unhon nai meri jaga jo naya larka ya tha peon us ko awaz lagai, who andar aya tu uss say mera intro karaya, meri ankho main us waqt tak anso thy who bhi herani say dekh raha tha k yeah ho kia raha hai, mere boss nai mera intro es tarhan shuru kia “Yeah mera beta hai, aik sal say tumhari jaga peon ki nokri karta raha hai aur aaj apni mehnat say U.K jar aha hai is say kuch sekh lo tumhare bht kaam aye gaa.”

Phir us larke ko apni gari ki chabi dete howe kaha k pichli seat par job hi rakha hai who utha kar le ao. Who key le kar chala gaya. Sir ne mujh ko U.K k mahjool wahan k atwar chal chalan k bare main bataya kuch nasihatain kari, mujh ko apne gher ka aur U.K main mojood aik aziz ka numr dia aura chi tarhan say sab kuch samjhane lage. Thoda hi dair main who larka andar aya tu us k hath main aik buht khoobsorat sa suitcase tha. Us  suitcase ko unhon nai apni table par rakha us larke ko kaha k tum bahar jao aur mujh ko uss suitcase ka code bataya aur us ko khola us ko khola tu uss main mere size ki 4 paints aur shirts thy 2 behtreen shoes thy. Aur kuch bhi tha, unhon nai kaha k yeah sab tumahre liye hai, jis din tm ne kaha tha k tum koshish kar rahe ho scholarship k liye tayari kar rahe ho mujh ko pora yaqin tha k tum zaroor jao gai. Aur usi din say mainnai tumhare jane k lie kuch tayari kari thi. Tum bilkul be fikr ho kar jana aur wahan jismaqsad k liye jrahe ho wohi karna wese bhi mujh ko pora yaqin hai k tum aik ache larke ho apne kam say kam rakho gai.”

Meri ankhon main aik dafa phir ansoo thy mgr unhon nai mujh ko gale lagaya bht dua di aur kaa k jis din tum jao gai us din main khud tumahre gher aon a aur tum ko airport chorne jaon gaa.

Phir unhon nai mujh ko dosre logon say milne ki ijazat di, staff room main mere liye aik dawat ka intizam kia gaya tha chooti si lunch party thi jis main idare ke sare hi log thay. Mujh kowahan warm welcome kara gaya, main tu jese hawaon main urh raha tha, main etna acha hon ar sare log mujh say khush hain aaj hi ehsas howa tha nahi tu aik Peon ki kia hesiyat hoti hai. Mgr main naihamesha apne kaam main kabhi kami nahi kari thi pori koshish kar raha tha k main apni bisat say barh kar kaam karon aur kisi ko bhi kisi bhi kaam k liye inkar na karon.